Many times people begin to talk about relationships and
they only see, discuss, and talk about one kind.
• Marriage
relationships.
• I
realize that there are some single adults here in the church and we are not
going to dismantle you and pick you apart and talk bad about you.
• We
want to strengthen your faith in God, challenge your growth in God and help you
see to it that you follow God's plan for your life.
• I
recognize there are some here this morning who have gone through the horrible
destructive life experience of divorce.
• I
want you to know that we are not going to destroy you but build you up, and
prayerfully work to bring healing, restoration, while pouring encouragement
back into your life and spirit.
1.
Rock solid relationship are built on
trust.
1.
Trust is having a confidence, a
safety, a security in those we love.
1.
If you can't trust someone then you can't
build with someone.
1.
Trust is earned.
2.
If you have broken trust in any
relationship it is so much more difficult to earn after breaking that trust
than when you first started it.
1.
Many of us when setting out to build
relationships never really consider the long term of that relationship, we see
the now, the present.
2.
Choosing right relationships are so
vital in this life because choosing someone who's life will potentially
influence yours could be detrimental to your spiritual, emotional, and physical
health.
1.
I've watched people for years
struggle in their own lives, their own careers, their own spiritual well being
all because they had to carry someone else in theirs.
2.
Carrying people is very difficult,
carrying people can set you so far back in your own life that you never become
all that God has created, destined, and designed in you.
1.
When setting out to choose right
relationships it's imperative that we are led by the Spirit of God.
1.
God is this a relationship you want
in my life?
2.
God I see some inconsistencies in
their life and I'm close enough to them to say something, I've said something
but have not experienced change.
1.
Should I move forward or back away?
1.
Some of us trust no one which is
unhealthy, some of us trust everyone which is unhealthy, some of us don't trust
God which is eternally unhealthy.
Proverbs 22:17 “17
Listen to the words of the wise; apply your heart to my instruction. 18 For it
is good to keep these sayings in your heart and always ready on your lips. 19 I
am teaching you today—yes, you—so
you will trust in the LORD.”
2.
The entire purpose and design of the
Word of God, His warnings, His instruction, His encouragement, and His love is
that you will trust in God.
3.
God is trustworthy and as men and
women of God we ought to be trustworthy.
1.
We are His witnesses and examples to
this world and it is imperative that we become mature into trustworthiness.
1.
If I desire to build something of
lasting, eternal value then there has to be trust!
1.
I must be trustworthy and I must
build on Godly and trustworthy relationships.
2.
Listen, if you have failed others
then man up and be responsible in the area of trust, or be a woman of your
word.
1.
Model the life changing, eternal
trust of the Word of God, the Love of God, and the sacrifice of God.
2.
Rock solid relationships are built on
truth.
1.
Truth is a very disturbing object to
find these days unless you know where to go to find it.
2.
Truth is a scarce commodity in this
culture and time, everyone has a truth they stand on, fight for, declare, and
sacrifice for.
1.
But Jesus declared that He is The
Way, The Truth, and The Life.
John 14:6 “6
Jesus told him, “I am the way, the
truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through Me.”
3.
Why is it so important to understand
and embrace the concept of absolute truth in all areas of life?
1.
Simply because life has consequences
for being wrong.
1.
Giving someone the wrong amount of a
medication can kill them; having an investment manager make the wrong monetary
decisions can impoverish a family; boarding the wrong plane will take you where
you do not wish to go; and dealing with an unfaithful marriage partner can
result in the destruction of a family and, potentially, disease.
3.
Rock solid relationships are built on
transparency.
1.
God's love is the source of all human
love.
1 John 4:19-21 "[19] We love each other because He
loved us first. [20] If someone says, "I love God," but hates a
brother or sister, that person is a liar; for if we don't love people we can
see, how can we love God, whom we cannot see? [21] And He has given us this
command: Those who love God must also love their brothers and sisters."
1.
Who is my brother, who is my sister,
who is my neighbor?
1.
Every one.
John 13:35 NLT "Your love for one another will prove
to the world that you are My disciples."
2.
The scripture tells us that the world
will know us by our love for one another.
1.
Not for our teamwork, not for our
unity, not for our financial abilities, not for our strength in difficult times
but for our love one for another.
2.
You can't fake true love.
Luke 10:27-29 NLT [27] The man answered, "'You must
love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength,
and all your mind.' And, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'" [28]
"Right!" Jesus told him. "Do this and you will live!" [29]
The man wanted to justify his actions, so he asked Jesus, "And who is my
neighbor?"
1.
All mankind.
3.
When you are wronged in any
relationship your immediate reaction is a heart issue.
4.
The way you immediately respond could
make or break the relationship.
1.
Knowing Christ always changes the
outcome and the response of the offended target.
1.
When you have been wronged the enemy
immediately sees his greatest opportunity of your eternal destruction because
if he can get you bitter, and he can get your Godly decision making blurry he
can absolutely and utterly ruin you.
2.
He'll have you making the most
selfish decisions based solely on your feelings that it's venomous poison in
the veins.
1.
It'll travel straight to the heart.
"Shot to heart and your to blame honey you give love a bad name." Bon
Jovi
2.
OR "Some say love, it is a
razor, That leaves your soul to bleed." Conway Twitty
2.
There is healing in the Word of God,
there is restoration in the worship of God, and there is life alteration in
relationship with God.
1.
It is so easy to say we love God when
that love doesn't cost us any more than weekly attendance at church services.
5.
But the real test of our love for God
is how we treat the people right in front of us.
1.
Our family members, friends,
coworkers, other Christ followers, or even our enemies.
1.
We can not truly love God while
neglecting to love those who are created in His image.
2.
Red and yellow, black, and white they
are precious in His sight.
6.
All races, all colors, all creeds,
all religions, all classes of people desperately need relationship with a rock
solid, all knowing, all powerful, all sacrificing, eternal love producing God.
1.
God is not interested in just trying
to tell us how many people to love but He is so much more interested in telling
us how much to love the people we already know.
Luke 6:27-36 NLT [27] "But to you who are willing to
listen, I say, love your enemies! Do good to those who hate you. [28] Bless
those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you. [29] If someone slaps you on
one cheek, offer the other cheek also. If someone demands your coat, offer your
shirt also. [30] Give to anyone who asks; and when things are taken away from
you, don't try to get them back. [31] Do to others as you would like them to do
to you. [32] "If you love only those who love you, why should you get
credit for that? Even sinners love those who love them! [33] And if you do good
only to those who do good to you, why should you get credit? Even sinners do
that much! [34] And if you lend money only to those who can repay you, why
should you get credit? Even sinners will lend to other sinners for a full
return. [35] "Love your enemies! Do good to them. Lend to them without
expecting to be repaid. Then your reward from heaven will be very great, and
you will truly be acting as children of the Most High, for He is kind to those
who are unthankful and wicked. [36] You must be compassionate, just as your
Father is compassionate."
7.
When we become Christians we are now
part of a global, eternal family of those past, present, and future Christ
followers.
1.
I want to represent my family well.
2.
I don't get to choose who is my
family, God does.
3.
I am simply called to accept and love
them.
1.
How well do you treat your fellow
family members?
4.
Rock solid relationships are built on
time.
1.
I refuse to be the person that tells
people that they are important to me yet never honor them with my greatest
commodity, time.
1.
People have lost homes, families,
marriages, friendships, all because they have refused to invest time.
2.
Love is demonstrated.
1.
We have to be very careful how we
demonstrate love.
2.
Our culture says that the deepest way
to represent love to its fullest is sex.
1.
Therefore we have entertainment, such
as "friends with benefits," where you have a sexual partner with no
emotional ties and they even have websites dedicated to rules to help you get
and most importantly keep your FWB.
1.
Released in America on July 22, 2011
became a commercial success at the box office grossing over $149.5 million
worldwide.
2.
"No strings attached" where
a couple tries to keep their relationship purely physical, not long they
discover they both want something more.
3.
Or "Hall Pass" where some
best friends and their wives, are both unhappy with their married lives and
missing the old days when they were single. Realizing this, their wives talk to
their friend Dr. Lucy and decide to give them a "Hall Pass": A week
off from marriage during which they can have sex with other women.
1.
Grossed Worldwide:$84 million
1.
Can you see how warped our culture
is?
2.
This is our reality.
3.
Is this how we spend our time?
1.
Go ahead call me old fashioned,
conservative, stick in the mud, traditionalist, fuddy-duddy, old fogy, I just
call myself a Christian.
2.
You can not build any thing of
lasting value on immorality and impurity except pornography a $97 billion
dollar a year industry, 28,000 internet users are watching porn every second.
1.
Why do we have sex trafficking,
prostitution, rape, and Pedophilia?
3.
The Old Testament said that it is
wrong for a person to have sex with someone other than his or her spouse.
1.
So relationally if you are not
married then you do not get to share in sex, at all, or in any way until
marriage, this is God's design.
2.
A male and a female for life.
1.
Adultery, sexual relations with
someone who is not his or her spouse is a sin.
2.
Fornication, sexual relations between
people who are not married to each other is a sin.
4.
Then in the New Testament Jesus said
that the desire to have sex with someone other than his or her spouse is mental
adultery and also sin.
1.
Jesus emphasized that if the act is
wrong, then so is the intention.
1.
To be faithful to your spouse with
your body but not your mind is to break the trust so vital to a strong marriage
relationship.
2.
Before marriage, during a
bachelor/bachelorette party, during tough times in marriage, during tempting
times, depressing times, and all through a marriage.
3.
Being faithful as a single adult to
your future spouse even when your lonely, discouraged or just dating.
2.
Relationships must make more deposits
than withdrawals.
Illustrate here: 2 tables. Love
notes, nice things to say, nice things to do. Caring statements of both
parties.
1.
But this is about what I want...
2.
Marriage is about the two becoming
one.
1.
The process unifies never divides.
2.
One flesh not two.
1.
We'll we just need some separation.
2.
We just need some space from one
another.
3.
No, no, no that is never what God
intended, designed, or dreamed.
1.
God never dreams of separating only
dreams of uniting.
2.
He never envisioned the husband
becoming just the wife or the wife just becoming the husband but they becoming
all He destined, designed, and blueprinted them to be together.
1.
We are powerful together.
2.
Marriage is not about you its about
unity, marriage is not about one its about becoming one.
3.
Singles wanna be married, want
togetherness, so they seek out companionship trying to find love, acceptance,
and agreement many times in all the wrong places.
1.
Don't look for a keeper in the sewer.
2.
As men and women of God we should be
men and women of integrity, character, purity, not manipulation, division, and
destruction.
3.
Be, what you say you are.
4.
Married couples want separation, want "me"
time, want their own things, and they want this and that.
1.
Not the design. Grow up.
1.
Spending honest time with those you
have relationship with.
2.
Spend time getting to know people,
especially people you allow to influence you or you wish to enter into covenant
with.
1.
Wherever you are be there.
3.
All of us have to better our
listening abilities, our responding abilities, our loving abilities and our
compassion abilities.
5.
Jesus teaches us continually through
the word that we are to examine our lives continually for anything that causes us
to sin, and take every necessary action to remove it.
1 Corinthians 10:13 NLT "The temptations in your life
are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not
allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, He
will show you a way out so that you can endure."
1.
Temptations happen to everyone, so
don't feel like you've been singled out.
2.
Others have resisted temptation and
so can you.
3.
Any temptation can be resisted
because God will show you a way out.
1.
Recognize those people and situations
that give you trouble.
2.
Run from anything you know is wrong.
1.
Running from a tempting situation is
your first step toward victory.
1.
It's my first step.
3.
Choose to do only what is right.
4.
Pray for God's help.
5.
Seek friends who love God and can
offer help when you are tempted.
6.
Many are searching the world for the
one instead of taking the time to deal with themselves so I can become the one
someone is looking for.
1.
God's plan for you is uncharted, it's
amazing, it's so great it would be a shame of criminal proportion to not
connect into it.
1.
Spending time with the ones we love
is the number one absolute way to influence them in a Christ like manner.
2.
Whether they are a friend, a family
member, a spouse, a child, or an
acquaintance.
7.
You can have, demonstrate and enjoy
Rock Solid Relationships in this life.
1.
Sincerely asking God for His guidance
He always reveals Himself and His will through His word.
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